This week, the boys did not follow me around the house, saying Mom.Mom.Mom like a broken record. Clearly any response and acknowledgment I gave was not satisfactory enough because they continued. I did not reply, "Mommy is not here right now... try again later!" just to get them to say something different.
not play with their food during meals.
A huge palm tree frawn did not fall 7 feet and land on my leg, right above my ankle. Why would it? This woman does not do 80% of the yard work and palm tree trimming, so clearly I would not be subject to such a battle wound. It's a good thing I chose to wear socks and shoes and not flip-flops.
I did not get all worked up over a comment a guy made in one of my classes. He (a guy who claims to work with special needs children) did not publicly announce his ignorance when he stated that autism is nothing more than just "a learned behavior."
The two older boys were not wrestling after they were instructed to stop. G did not go face-first into N's knee and bust his lip. He did not grab his mouth and come running to the kitchen. In route he did not touch the cream-colored sectional with his fingers, which were of course not bloody. [In case you're wondering who in their right mind has a cream-colored couch in a home that houses 4 small children (and boys at that), I would not know. Surely, it is not us!]
This was not our house during baths/showers.
I have not listened to Third Day's Revelation CD thirty something times already. G's favorite is not #13.
The laundry pile has not managed to find its way back into an overflowing basket, sitting oh-so-comfortably on our bedroom floor. Did it not understand that once I put it away on Wednesday, it needed to wait at least another week before reemerging?
While I was putting the last batch of cookies on the cookie sheet, Z did not dump the entire 2.5 pound bag of raisins on the floor. His older brother did not walk across the couch and smoosh some of the raisins into the cream-colored couch (which we do not have) as I was trying to rescue the raisins. Oh, the 2.5 pounds of rescued raisins.... they did not get put back into the bag, and surely they did not wind up back in the pantry.
Our pillows were not used to build a secret clubhouse.
I did not say, "You can pick your nose" after getting asked what fun things there was to do. N did not quickly shove his finger up his nostril and ask, "You mean like this?"